Scream

I was somewhat paralyzed by choice for this essay, because there are so many wonderful vids I want to go on at length about. (It’s…a thing I do. Never ask me about vids in person. Never ask me about anything in person.) In the end, I picked this one because it amazes me, because I have a lot to say about it, and because it’s been relevant to my life lately. (Spoiler: I am not a companion and have not gone for a ride in the TARDIS. Just in case you were wondering.)

So, here we go. Four reasons why I love Scream, by Laura Shapiro and Kass.

One: Helpful Life Lessons for Prospective Time Travelers

To me, this vid is about – well, a couple of things, but most of all it’s about the companion cycle. The Doctor, he likes himself some companionship, and he’s got his routine for getting it down pat. (He is, as the vid description says, the ultimate pick-up artist.)

We all fall a little bit.

His first step is to dazzle them – promise them everything, show them how amazing the universe really is. And that’s the entire first section of this vid. The Doctor sees someone special and shows them something special. Every companion gets seduced the same way; the parallels in the early clips are so pointed, so clear. (And that, to me, is the first glimpse of the sharp, sharp edge that is still mostly hidden in the first part of the vid, because – yes, the Doctor thinks you are so, so special, companions. Just like he did all the others.) And we understand it, is the thing; this vid puts us perfectly in the companions’ shoes. If there’s a better pick-up line than, “I have an actual time machine, do you want to ride in?” I am not sure what it is. (Even forewarned, I’d guaranteed fall for that, so guaranteed that I just made “someone with an actual working time machine” an official permitted exception in my marriage. My wife’s response: “I thought that was already a given, because…you.” Ah, marriage.) So it’s no surprise every companion falls hard, the same way, every time. We all fall a little bit. Because it is amazing.

The Doctor’s next step – and I don’t think he does it on purpose, at all, but the pattern is clear – is to destroy them. The companion cycle, uh – it isn’t a love story. The second part of the vid shows what happens once you fall for the Doctor: delight and seduction are rapidly followed by complication, destruction, and discard (if there’s even anything left to discard).

Starting at around 1:30, we get to watch the companions scream in terror, have their literal voices taken away (around 2:22, the part of the vid that wins my personal Most Horrifying award), and fall apart. And fall, and fall.

And then the vid takes us back around to the start, with a brand-new companion. We get to see her shining delight, her wonder, the start of her adventure – but now we know what’s coming. And she doesn’t. It’s the creepiest part of the whole thing. I love how this vid takes all these fun, cute, sweet moments, and overlays them with horror, because, uh, maybe the Doctor didn’t mention this to you, lady, but – he isn’t a tame Time Lord. And you aren’t going to come out of this with a bunch of funny stories to tell the grandkids. Hope you’re ready to go all night, Clara!

You won’t get to see the morning.

Basically, this vid is here to teach us all that the most successful survival strategy in the Doctor Who universe is: if you see the Doctor, kick him hard in both shins and then run away.

Two: Song Choice, Song Choice, Song Choice

I know, I know, this is very the first day of Vidding 101: An Introduction to Vid Reviews for Non-Majors, but the song choice makes this vid. Or maybe this vid makes the song. Not sure which.

this vid unpacks the song

This vid unpacks the song, slices off its cheesy, hey-baby-can-I-buy-you-an-orgasm surface to expose a seamy underbelly of horror. Honestly, I no longer have any idea if that underbelly of horror exists in the song when it stands alone; like all great vids, this one looped back into my interpretation of the song. They’re married forever in my head, now.

It’s…probably not the happiest marriage, gotta say.

So we start with the literal fireworks on “thinking ‘bout what I’d do to that body” (around 0:12), because sometimes subtlety is overrated, and we go all the way to the most flesh-crawling interpretations of “one life, just live it” and “I wanna take off all your clothes and put something on you” ever (1:50-2:10ish). And in between and all around, we have every interpretation of “Oooh baby baby” you can possibly want. It’s a thing of beauty and terror forever.

I love how this video does for the song exactly what it does for Doctor Who: rips it to pieces and shows you the creepy, horrifying seams.

dick jokes must fall

Three: Every Vid Needs a Dick Joke

Into every vid of slowly spiraling creepiness, a few dick jokes must fall. Or, okay, no, probably not, but one of the things I love about this vid is how certain clips still make me laugh. The vidders are not at all going to shy away from the literal interpretation of this song, no – they’ve thrown in a few thrusting phallic objects (check out 0:50-1:05, for example) and literally explosive orgasms (like at 1:14), for every viewer who ever read an overblown sex scene and giggled a little. (I really hope that’s all of us.)

This vid also has great examples of what I think of as beat humor, where the vidders hit the beat in a way that’s so perfect and unexpected it’s actually funny. Like, check out the pulsing Dalek, uh, bits (I don’t know what you call those bits) at 1:35 – it’s so right and so surprising that I smile helplessly every time I see it.

a cautionary tale of terror

What I’m saying is, “Scream” has moments of emotional contrast, like every good story needs to. Sure, it’s mostly a cautionary tale of terror, but you also get to laugh, and I think that actually makes the other emotional beats hit harder, because you relax for just a second and then the vid punches you again, when you’re not expecting it. It’s great.

the companion cycle: excitement, love, disillusionment, sadness, loss

Four: The Meta Cherry on Top

But none of those first three reasons are why I decided to write an essay about this specific vid. See, I love a vid that gets meta on me, that isn’t just about the canon or the characters, but also, to a certain extent, about my own life, or something in my own life. And this vid, this vid does all of that. And so it has taken on special meaning for me in the last six months.

See, my sister is a Doctor Who fan from waaaay back. (I think her One True Doctor is, like, Six?) Her oldest son has been a Doctor Who fan for coming up on a decade, and when he fans, my friends, he does it right, and by “right” I mean “as obsessively as humanly possible.” And all that was true when I first saw this vid. I’d watched my family watch Doctor Who. I’d watched my friends watch Doctor Who. I’d even seen a bit of Doctor Who myself. I thought I knew the deal.

But then my son discovered Doctor Who, and living through his experience of it turned everything up to eleven. First, there was his wide-eyed amazement and delight – so many cool concepts! Oh my god a TARDIS you can TRAVEL THROUGH TIME that is the BEST THING IN THE WORLD! And then he still loved it, but he had some disturbing unanswered questions (“But why do so many people die? Why can’t the Doctor save everyone?” “Why does she have to lose her memory? Why does she have to go to jail just because the Doctor is mad at her?”). And then, eventually, he started backing slowly away. Twelve broke him. He couldn’t take the Doctor, and he especially couldn’t take what happened to Clara. His wide eyes didn’t mean wonder anymore.

Basically, my son went through the viewer’s version of the companion cycle: excitement, love, disillusionment, sadness, loss. And watching him do that made me get “Scream” on a level I hadn’t before, made me understand how sad it is, as well as how horrifying. Because really this vid is about loving something that is going to hurt you. And that’s the Doctor, and it’s also the show.

So the thing I love most about this vid is that it isn’t just about the companions, and it isn’t just about the canon. It’s about both the Doctor, this fascinating, extremely imperfect being, and Doctor Who, this fascinating, extremely imperfect show. That we love. That makes us scream. In every sense of the word.

And I love that.